SCENE ONE: JACK IS IN HIS OFFICE, TRYING TO THROW SCREWED UP BITS OF PAPER IN THE WASTEPAPER BASKET ON HIS DESK. HE PICKS UP A FLYER WHICH IS ABOUT A JOURNALISM CONVENTION IN ATLANTIC CITY.

 

JACK: Well I couldn't imagine anything I'd rather face than a bunch of drunk journalists and publishers in Atlantic City, alone.

 

JENNIFER OPENS THE DOOR JUST AS HE SCREWS UP THE FLYER AND TRIES TO GET IN THE BASKET.

 

JENNIFER: Oh....nice try Jack. Almost.

JACK: Thanks. Do you want something?

JENNIFER: I have the Webster article.

JACK: Only a day late.

JENNIFER: I left a message for you that Mr. Simmo wasn't available for an interview until early this morning. I just finished putting the quotes in. You were supposed to call me if that was a problem.

JACK: I don't remember getting a message.

 

HE PICKS UP HIS COFFEE CUP AND THERE IS A PIECE OF PAPER STUCK TO THE BOTTOM OF IT.

 

JENNIFER: You didn't get a mes....yes, you did get a message Jack.

JACK: Well, obviously getting a message wasn't enough. Basket by Kareem Abdul Jabar.

JENNIFER: Jack I worked all night on that article.

JACK: I needed it yesterday. It's of no use to me today.

JENNIFER: I think there's something more going on here than my article. What is it Jack?

JACK: Nothing.

JENNIFER: Does it have anything to do with your date?

JACK: (Forgetting about the excuse he made the other night when he showed up dressed like a 50s biker.) Date?

JENNIFER: The other night.

JACK: Date? The other night?

JENNIFER: Yes you came to my apartment looking like something out of Hell's Angels. Does that ring any bells?

JACK: Oh yes, yes. What about it?

JENNIFER: How was it?

JACK: (Jack is uncomfortable.) It was....er....none of your business.

JENNIFER: Well, sorry I asked.

JACK: (Putting up his defenses again, as he always does when they get to close and personal.) Let me say something Jennifer. I think we've been discussing our personal lives a little too much. It's not healthy. I think from now on our conversations will be strictly business. Professional. I'm the boss and you are the employee. You got that?

JENNIFER: Boy, somebody got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.

JACK: No, maybe I just woke up and smelled the coffee.

JENNIFER: What does that mean Jack?

JACK: It means that I realize that you're going to be working here for at least another year and it's important that we maintain a business relationship of employer and employee.

JENNIFER: Sounds more like prisoner and warden.

JACK: Call it whatever you want but from now on our conversations will have a professional tenor.

JENNIFER: (Frustrated) Alright Jack, that's just fine. If that's the way you want it, I will not enquire about or make reference to anything outside of this office.

JACK: Good.

JENNIFER: Great.

 

EMILIO BARGES IN, INTERRUPTING THEM.

 

EMILIO: I hope I ain't interrupting.

JACK: Oh not more than usual.

JENNIFER: Not at all Emilio.

EMILIO: Hey Deveraux, where are those good lookin duds you had? Or you only wear them on a full moon?

JACK: My friend, I forgot to congratulate your fashion sense. But I didn't know that Dress for Less carried suits in your size?

EMILIO: Hey, hey, heeeeyyy!

JACK: Heeeeyyy!

 

EMILIO GRABS JACK'S THROAT.

 

JACK: Oooh! It sounds better when you say it.

JENNIFER: Shouldn't we be going?

JACK: Going? Going where?

JENNIFER: Oh Jack, you know I believe that's a personal question. But since you are my employer I will tell you that I'm going to lunch but what I intend to do on my lunch hour....well it's personal. Ready?

EMILIO: Oh I'm always ready. After you.

JENNIFER: Thank you Emilio.

 

JENNIFER WINKS AT JACK AND WALKS OUT.

 

EMILIO: Hey, have a nice lunch.

 

EMILIO WALKS OUT.

 

JACK: They'll probably eat at Shenanigan's. It's the only thing he can afford on his lousy pay anyway.

 

JACK PUNCHES HIS WASTE BIN THEN SUCKS HIS KNUCKLES.

 

JACK: OUCH! Ouch

SCENE TWO: JENNIFER AND EMILIO ARE HAVING LUNCH AT SHENANIGAN'S. JACK AND ANJELICA COME IN FOR LUNCH AS WELL. JACK SITS OPPOSITE ANJELICA AND STARES AT JENNIFER. MEANWHILE EMILIO IS TRYING TO BE AMUSING BY TELLING HER A STUPID STORY, BUT JENNIFER IS TOO ENGROSSED STARING AT JACK.

 

EMILIO: Listen what's going on with you and Deveraux?

JENNIFER: Nothing.

EMILIO: Well it didn't seem like that back at the office.

JENNIFER: No nothing. He was just giving me a hard time, that's all.

EMILIO: You don't have to be here if you don't want to.

JENNIFER: No, no, it's fine, really. Besides you haven't finished my fries.

EMILIO: Are you sure?

JENNIFER: Yes I'm sure. Now tell me about this dog you bought.

 

 

AT JACK'S TABLE, HE IS IGNORING ANJELICA AND STILL STARING.

ANJELICA: And so with Adrienne spending so much time away things are getting better and better, father and son are getting to know each other and Justin and I are getting to be friends again. As a matter of fact, yesterday he walked in the house, ripped off my clothes and made passionate love to me on the dining room table. Jack....

JACK: Really....

ANJELICA: Jack! You are about as subtle as a bumble bee sting.

JACK: What are you talking about?

ANJELICA: You are staring at Jennifer Horton, are you not?

JACK: I'm not staring.

ANJELICA: No you're right, you're leering.

JACK: Oh.

ANJELICA: If you are that interested in her why don't you just go over and talk to her.

JACK: Of course I'm interested in her. She's my employee. I'm her boss. But I am not leering.

ANJELICA: Hmmm.

JACK: I am not.

ANJELICA: Hmmm, me thinks the gentleman doth protest too much.

JACK: Well it doesn't matter what I do or think anyway.

ANJELICA: Of course it does Jack. Why would you say that?

JACK: Because like everybody else in this town, Jennifer doesn't respect me as her employer because of my past track record. That's all she thinks of.

ANJELICA: I see. Well for most people in this town, that's a pretty hard thing to overlook.

JACK: Thank you for your support.

ANJELICA: I said for most people, Jack. You know something, you may be right. Maybe in Salem she does see you just for who you were.

JACK: What are you suggesting? That I leave town.

ANJELICA: Yes, exactly.

JACK: Thank you.

ANJELICA: No Jack, listen to me. Why don't you leave town with Jennifer? I mean if Salem is where she thinks of you and sees you as who you were, maybe if you get her away from here, she'll see you for who you are.

JACK: Get Jennifer out of this one horse town? Anjelica, I think you've got a point there.

SCENE THREE: LUNCH IS OVER.

 

ANJELICA: I don't know about you but I have some errands to run.

JACK: Anjelica, please allow me. I mean after all it's the least I can do after all the advice you've given me.

ANJELICA: Yes, well thank you Jack. I just hope you take this advice to heart. So long darling.

JACK: So long.

 

JACK LOOKS ACROSS AT JENNIFER AND EMILIO LAUGHING AND HAVING A GOOD TIME. HE WALKS OVER.

 

JACK: Jennifer I need to speak to you.

EMILIO: Oh if it isn't Clark Kent. Can't you see that she's having lunch?

JACK: Emilio, once again you state the obvious.

EMILIO: Are you getting in my face again? I wasn't sure.

JENNIFER: Stop it both of you. Don't start. What is it Jack?

JACK: I think it would be best if we spoke alone.

JENNIFER: Emilio, I'm sorry. Would you mind if we talked alone?

EMILIO: Um, that's cool. I'll call work and check my schedule. (To Jack) But don't worry. I got my eye on you.

JACK: (Showing Jennifer to her Chair.) Please.

JENNIFER: Ah Jack, why don't you tell me what I did wrong this time?

JACK: Well that's just it. You've been doing a lot of things wrong lately. Around the office that is.

JENNIFER: But you keep telling me what a good job I'm doing.

JACK: Yes well what I mean is that you have been trying very hard, maybe a little too hard. I think your eagerness is getting in the way of your professionalism. It's about time you started to mature. As a reporter I mean.

JENNIFER: Okay. Well how do you suggest I do that?

JACK: I think the best way to do that would be to hang around with professional reporters. Be like a sponge and soak up their expertise. For example, spend some time at a journalism convention.

JENNIFER: Alright Jack, the next time a convention comes up, I will look into it.

JACK: That's a funny coincidence. It just so happens I'm going to a journalism convention in Atlantic City today.

JENNIFER: Oh Jack, that's very funny.

JACK: I'm not joking. I think you should go.

JENNIFER: You want me to go to Atlantic City with you, today?

JACK: No time like the present.

JENNIFER: Oh Jack, I don't believe this.

JACK: It will be strictly business of course.

JENNIFER: Of course.

JACK: There'll be a lot of big newspapers there. Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, New York Times....

JENNIFER: Jack I don't know.

JACK: Well it's quite an opportunity but if you're not ready for it, maybe sometime soon.

JENNIFER: Can I think it over?

JACK: Better think quick. I've got to leave today, this afternoon.

JENNIFER: Alright, well I'll think about it and I'll call you and let you know, alright. Thanks.

JACK: Don't mention it. Just thinking about your career.

SCENE FOUR: JACK LEAVES AND EMILIO TELLS JENNIFER THAT SHE WOULD BE CRAZY TO GO. EMILIO SAYS DEVERAUX HAS ONE THING IN MIND; DISAGREES. JENNIFER GETS ANGRY WHEN EMILIO INSULTS JACK. SO SHE GOES TO THE PHONE AND CALLS JACK ON THE PHONE.

SCENE FIVE: JACK IS SITTING IN HIS OFFICE PLAYING WITH A PAPER PLANE, AWAITING JENNIFER'S CALL, WHEN THE PHONE RINGS.

 

JACK: Hello, Jack Deveraux.

JENNIFER: Hi Jack, it's Jennifer. I thought about your offer.

JACK: (Extremely pleased, but acting cool and unemotional.) Yes?

JENNIFER: And I'll go.

JACK: Oh Jennifer, could you hold for a minute? Thank you.

 

JACK PUTS HER ON HOLD AND PUTS DOWN THE PHONE. HE JUMPS ONTO HIS DESK IN ONE LEAP. THERE HE DOES A LITTLE TAP DANCE SINGING AS HE GOES.

 

JACK: "Leaving on a jet plane Don't know when I'll be back again." Yeah!

 

THEN HE JUMPS BACK TO THE FLOOR AND PICKS UP THE PHONE AGAIN. HE NONCHALANTLY CONTINUES HIS CONVERSATION WITH JENNIFER.

 

JACK: Ah, Jennifer, yes. Why don't we meet at the airport in say....an hour?

JENNIFER: Okay, sounds good.

JACK: Terminal two, how about that?

JENNIFER: Okay.

JACK: Good.

JENNIFER: Bye, bye.

 

THEY BOTH HANG UP. THEY BOTH ARE HOPING THAT MORE WILL COME OUT OF THIS TRIP.

 

JENNIFER: (Crossing her fingers.) Oh please let this work.

JACK: (Grinning) This is really going to work.

 

JACK SENDS THE PAPER PLANE FLYING ACROSS THE OFFICE.

SCENE FIVE: A HOUR LATER JENNIFER HAS JUST BOARDED THE PLANE. SHE IS CONFUSED, THINKING SHE IS IN THE WRONG PLACE, BECAUSE IT IS A PRIVATE JET AND NOT A COMMERCIAL PLANE.

 

JENNIFER: I was looking for Flight 111 to Atlantic City.

FLIGHT ATTENDANT: This is Flight 111. The plane was chartered.

JENNIFER: By who?

 

JACK WALKS IN.

 

JACK: By me.

 

JACK COMES OUT OF THE FRONT CABIN. HE HAS CHANGED INTO BLACK JEANS AND HE IS BUTTONING. HE LOOKS MIGHTY HANDSOME.

 

JENNIFER: Jack, what's going on?

 

JACK SIGNALS HER TO BE QUIET AND SPEAKS TO THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT.

 

JACK: I can take it from here.

FLIGHT ATTENDANT: (She seems taken by Jack, speaking rather seductively.) Of course, Mr. Deveraux.

 

THE ATTENDANT LEAVES THEM ALONE.

 

JACK: (To Jennifer) I like to travel in comfort, not steerage. So, that'll be champagne, caviar?

JENNIFER: Well I'm more used to little bags of honey roasted nuts, Jack.

JACK: Oh. Then you just turn around and you sit yourself down right over here and relax. You do like champagne don't you?

JENNIFER: (Teasing, but it seems she would not mind it much if it were more than just a business trip.) I thought this was a business trip Jack. But maybe I was wrong about what kind of business you had in mind. Was I wrong Jack?

JACK: Of course it's business. I mean why else would I ask you?

JENNIFER: Then what's all this? The private plane, the champagne, the caviar.

JACK: (Charming and rather romantic) Just because it's a business trip doesn't mean we don't go in style. For me this is traveling style. First class and I thought maybe you'd enjoy going in first class with me. But it's no big deal. We can send this little plane home and take a commercial flight.

JENNIFER: No, um....there's nothing wrong with it. It's fine. Actually it's very nice.

JACK: Okay then, how about a toast. To new experiences.

 

SCENE ONE: JACK AND JENNIFER HAVE JUST RETURNED TO JENNIFER'S HOTEL ROOM AFTER A DAY AT THE CONFERENCE.

 

JACK: Oh air conditioning.

JENNIFER: I can't believe we got through three more hours of meetings in that ballroom without air conditioning. I thought being here at least would make a difference.

JACK: Oh please. It does. You don't know what it feels like in New York City today.

JENNIFER: Yeah you're right. Don't tell me because I'm not going to be able to move again for hours.

JACK: (Reluctant to leave.) Ah....well I guess we better call it a day, huh?

JENNIFER: (Also Reluctant ) Oh yeah, I guess so.

JACK: Yeah.

JENNIFER: Oh Jack?

JACK: Yeah.

JENNIFER: I just wanted to....um....thank you for bringing me along. I learned a lot, just today.

JACK: Oh I'm glad. I am.

JENNIFER: (Reluctant to see him go.) Okay. Well....good night.

JACK: Yeah I guess you're probably pretty tired. Probably going to hit the hay, right?

JENNIFER: Aren't you?

JACK: Well no, no not really, no.

JENNIFER: You know, me neither. I haven't even had a chance to even look at anything yet.

JACK: (Seeing this as his chance.) Really? Well in that case....er....I'm going to take you with me.

JENNIFER: What? I can't believe you. You're going to take me where?

 

JACK TAKES HER HAND AND SPINS HER AROUND. (THEY ARE BOTH EXCITED)

 

JACK: Come on Jennifer. You didn't think that I brought you all this way just to sit in some steamy seminars did you? Really.

JENNIFER: Jack, what are your talking about?

JACK: What am I talking about?

JENNIFER: Yes. If you didn't bring me here to sit through meetings then why did you bring me here?

JACK: Why did I bring you here?

JENNIFER: Jack stop repeating everything I say and tell me the reason you brought me to Atlantic City.

JACK: The reason....

 

IN TYPICAL JACK FASHION HE IS UNABLE TO BE HONEST ABOUT HIS FEELINGS FOR HER. SO HE TRIES TO THINK UP AN EXCUSE.

 

JENNIFER: Yes.

JACK: Alright, I'll be honest with you. I didn't bring to you here to sit and suffer in a steamy seminar with a bunch of people you'll probably never see again. I brought you here to....er....to....er....to do some research.

JENNIFER: (Very disappointed) Oh, research for what?

JACK: (Making it up as he goes along.) On a....on a story. A big story for the Sunday edition. That's it, that's the.....ah....gambling, casinos, the life of the high roller, yeah. We're going to do a story. What do you think? You could share a by-line.

JENNIFER: You want me to co-write a Sunday cover piece?

JACK: I think you're up to it. Yes.

JENNIFER: Oh Jack this is incredible. I don't know what to say.

JACK: Don't say anything. I have a lot of expectations in you and your writing.

JENNIFER: Well thank you, that means a lot to me Jack.

JACK: Good. Well let's say we get downstairs and see how the other half have fun.

JENNIFER: Great. That's fine. Oh wait Jack. Maybe we should change?

JACK: Change? You mean like out of....(He takes a big sniff under his right arm.) out of these damp clothes.

JENNIFER: (Enjoying his antics) Yes, maybe into something a little more casual.

JACK: Casual? Yes, casual could be very good. Yes. See you downstairs in five minutes.

JENNIFER: (Trying to tell him how she really feels.) Oh Jack, um I just wanted to tell you that things have really changed between the two of us in the past few months.

JACK: You mean the past few minutes?

JENNIFER: No, the past few months. This job has really made a big difference in my life and it's all thanks to you.

JACK: (Avoiding looking at her) Well what can I say? I mean you've earned it.

JENNIFER: Well I'm very grateful. It's terrific opportunity and you're an okay boss (It is obvious by her expression that he is more than just that). See you in ten minutes.

 

SHE GOES INTO THE BATHROOM.

 

JACK: (Happy with himself) "You're an okay boss...." that's it. "That's the ticket." (Imitating Jon Lovitz) Yeah.

SCENE TWO: JACK AND JENNIFER ENTER THE CASINO. HE IS WEARING VERY TIGHT PALE YELLOW SHORTS WITH A YELLOW FLORAL HAWAIIAN STYLE SHIRT AND A YELLOW SUNSHADE. HIS BLACK SOCKS ARE PULLED UP HIGH AND HE IS WEARING BLACK SHOES. JENNIFER IS WEARING A DARK SPOTTED DRESS.

 

JENNIFER: (Excited, impressed) Wow, look at that.

JACK: Hey, write it down, write it down. We don't want to forget our first impressions on being here. For the article of course.

JENNIFER: Okay, okay.

JACK: Tell me, have you ever played any of these games?

JENNIFER: Oh yeah. I used to play Blackjack all the time. With the sorority. Jack, don't you believe me?

JACK: Oh with a poker face like that, of course I believe you, yeah.

JENNIFER: Come on Jack, let's play. Come on, I'll show you how. Come on, sit down.

JACK: (Pretending to know nothing and enjoying letting her show him how to play.) Oh, over here?

JENNIFER: Yeah.

JACK: Okay.

 

THEY SIT UP AT A CASINO BLACKJACK TABLE.

 

DEALER: In or out?

JENNIFER: He's in. Smack 'em.

JACK: Ah, what? What?

JENNIFER: Smack 'em. That's what you say when you want a card. Trust me alright. Smack 'em. Oh sorry. Bet.

 

SHE TAKES SOME CHIPS OUT OF JACK'S HAND AND PUTS THEM IN FRONT OF HIS CARD HAND. JACK'S HAND IS DEALT AND HE PICKS UP THE CARDS.

 

JACK: Now what do we do?

JENNIFER: (Very excited) Oh Jack, you've got a pair, split!

JACK: A what?

JENNIFER: That's when you have two cards the same. That means you play two hands because you have two cards the same right. Here put em down like this. Match the bet. Smack 'em.

 

SHE SEPARATES THE PAIR AND PUTS THEM FACE UP ON THE TABLE AND ADDS THE SAME NUMBER OF CHIPS TO THE SECOND CARD.

 

DEALER: Smack 'em huh?

JENNIFER: That's the name of the game isn't it?

JACK: (Not wanting to spoil her fun.) Oh well it's close enough, yeah.

JENNIFER: Okay come on. Come on.

 

THE DEALER DEALS A CARD ON TOP OF THE FIRST HAND.

 

JENNIFER: Okay, that's seventeen. You want to ice it right there. That means you don't want any more cards but over here (She points to the second hand.) you only have nine and you can play on it.

JACK: Oh.

JENNIFER: Smack 'em again.

JACK: Huh, uh!

JENNIFER: Oh, smack em again. Oh Jack, Jack.

JACK: What, what?

JENNIFER: It's so great. One more card and you'll have Five Card Chancy.

JACK: Who?

JENNIFER: If you have Twenty-one under five cards, that's the best that there is. And you only have four cards and they're doing you a favor. And you bet big enough that you could end up being the Bull Goose Lucy.

JACK: The who?

JENNIFER: The Bull Goose Lucy.

JACK: Oh forget it. Whatever. You're the shark here. Whatever you say....

JENNIFER: Thanks. (She prompts him to ask for another card.)

JACK: Ah....er....slap me. Hit me...

JENNIFER: No, smack 'em, smack 'em.

DEALER: Twenty-two. You're out.

 

THEY BOTH SIT WITH THEIR MOUTHS OPEN AS THE DEALER GATHERS IN THE CHIPS.

 

JENNIFER: I don't believe we lost. (Beat) Jack I'm sorry.

DEALER: Maybe next time try it without you good luck charm, pal. Smack me?

 

THE OTHER PLAYERS LAUGH AND JENNIFER IS HUMILIATED.

 

JACK: Jennifer look....

JENNIFER: Jack, look....I have to....I'll be right back.

 

SHE RUNS AWAY FROM THE TABLE. JACK IS CONCERNED FOR A SECOND THEN TURNS BACK TO THE TABLE.

 

JACK: (Getting serious) Alright gents. Smack me like the little lady says. That's what they say that where I come from. Hehehehe. Yeah!

 

HE SITS INTENTLY WATCHING HIS CARDS. HE PICKS THEM UP AND HAS BLACKJACK.

 

JACK: Well I'll be a Bull Goose Lucy. That's not in five card calls me but the night is young. Let's play cards. Hahahahaha.

SCENE THREE: STILL AT THE BLACKJACK TABLE, JACK HAS WON A HEAP OF CHIPS.

 

JACK: You know something. You're a good dealer and believe me, I've been dealt with a few. Hahahaha. What's the matter guys, haven't you ever played before?

 

HE SIPS HIS DRINK WHICH IS FULL OF FRUIT AND HAS A PINK UMBRELLA IN IT. JENNIFER IS WATCHING FROM BEHIND.

 

JACK: Come on, deal em buddy. Papa needs a new pair of Guccis.

 

JACK TAPS HIS SHOE AND LAUGHS LOUDLY AGAIN. JENNIFER SEES HIS WINNINGS.

 

JENNIFER: Well I guess those guys at the table really knew what they were doing.

JACK: Jennifer.

JENNIFER: Hi.

JACK: Hi.

JENNIFER: Gee did I miss anything?

JACK: Ah, no not much. (She looks at the pile of chips.) Ah you mean this? Oh I can explain this.

JENNIFER: Okay.

JACK: Ah, would you believe beginner's luck?

JENNIFER: No.

JACK: How about....er....

JENNIFER: How about the truth Jack?

JACK: The truth? Oh, okay so I know how to play smack Jack.

JENNIFER: Oh really? No kidding.

JACK: Oh Jennifer, I just let you go on and show off what you learned at your little (Slurring) sorority.

JENNIFER: Wait a minute Jack. Don't you go talking about my sorority like that.

JACK: I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't mean that. I didn't mean your little sorority, I meant your big sorority.

JENNIFER: I am not some air-headed sorority girl alright. (It is obvious that Jennifer wants Jack to see that there is more to her than meets the eye. She wants Jack to take more than a professional interest in her.) Maybe one day you'll realize what kind of girl I really am.

 

JENNIFER WALKS AWAY VERY UPSET AND ANGRY WITH HIM.

 

JACK: (Scrambling to catch up with her.) I....I do. Jennifer I do. (Talking to the Dealter) Here save these for me would you? Jennifer wait a minute. Jennifer I do. I know how much you've got going for you. Look I know what you've got and I want....(To passing waitress) Excuse me. (He picks up two glasses of champagne and gives one to Jennifer.) And I just happened wanted to make a toast.

JENNIFER: To what?

JACK: (Again making it up as he goes along.) Well to....er....to you. To your talent and your compassion and your.....and your er.....your talent and compassion and your....career and well I'm just glad that you decided to come with me.

JENNIFER: So am I Jack. And thanks for helping me.

JACK: Help you? Come on, what?

JENNIFER: To mature....maybe? (Gesturing with her fingers, putting her thumb and finger a fraction of a inch apart.) (Beat) A little?

JACK: (Smiling) Maybe....maybe a lot.

THE STAND AND LOOK IN EACH OTHER'S EYES.

SCENE FOUR: LATER THAT NIGHT THEY RETURN TO JENNIFER'S ROOM. JACK IS SO DRUNK HE CAN HARDLY WALK AND IS STILL HOLDING A GLASS OF WINE. HE HAS THE SUNSHADE ON BACKWARDS AND THE PINK UMBRELLA IS STICKING OUT OF HIS HAIR.

 

JACK: "Home again, home again, jiggety jig!"

JENNIFER: Alright Jack, here we go.

JACK: Here we go.

JENNIFER: Here we go. Come on.

JACK: Where are we going?

JENNIFER: Right over here. Come on.

JACK: Oh right over here. Oh yes. We're going to bed. Are you taking me to bed?

JENNIFER: (Rather amused) No, no, no, no. I'm putting you to bed.

JACK: "Putting"....well that's nice. That's nice. Oh and it is nice, it is.

 

JACK BOUNCES ON THE BED.

 

JENNIFER: Isn't it? Nice isn't it?

JACK: It's a start.

JENNIFER: Okay. I'm going to go in the bathroom and I'm going to fix some coffee in that little coffee machine okay.

JACK: I don't want any coffee.

JENNIFER: (Removing the glass from his hand.) Yeah, yeah, you do. You do. You want coffee.

JACK: I do.

JENNIFER: I'll be right back.

JACK: I do and I'll be on my back.

 

HE FLOPS BACK ON THE BED.

 

JACK: Better yet, I'll be on my stomach.

 

HE ROLES OVER AND BURIES HIS FACE IN THE MATTRESS.

 

JACK: Aaaargh, aaaargh! Jennifer?

JENNIFER: What Jack?

JACK: Did you call me?

JENNIFER: No, Jack.

JACK: No Jack, no Jack. Why not, yes Jack. I want a....Never a yes Jack. Always a no Jack. Why not a nice simple yes Jack.

 

JENNIFER POPS HER HEAD OUT OF THE BATHROOM.

 

JENNIFER: Yes Jack.

JACK: Yes, Jack. Yes. And now, now. (He slowly stands up.) That's it. Oooh. (Pulling down the legs of his shorts, that have ridden up.) Now, now I can die a happy Jack. (He picks up a tulip from the vase and holds it aloft.)Yes Jack. (He flops back on the bed.) That's all I needed. Just a little bit of encouragement. There's no such thing as a bad boy Father Flannigan. Yeah. Yes Jack.

JENNIFER: (From the bathroom) Jack how do you want your coffee?

 

THE BOOZE HAS MADE JACK OPEN UP, AND HAS MADE HIM ABLE TO ADMIT HIS TRUE FEELINGS.

 

JACK: Straight. Straight. I like it straight. When you're straight with me....You're always straight with me.... And.... and.... and sincere. I like sinc.... I like it sincere. I want sincere and honest. You're always honest and oh, oh, better looking than a Five Goose Lucy and a Chancy Launcey. I could never have that kind of luck eh? Oh not the way I've played. No siree, Bob, Chuck. Oh I don't deserve.... I don't deserve you. No, trust me Jennifer, no. I just drag women down. Yeah. Right and left. I don't mean to. Just natural I guess but this is something I do. I don't want to drag you down Jennifer. Trust me. Trust me.

 

JENNIFER LOOKS ON FEELING SAD.

 

JENNIFER: Jack. (He is sound asleep) Oh Jack.

 

TENDERLY SHE CLIMBS ON THE BED AND PULLS THE QUILT OVER HIM WHILE HE SLEEPS. SHE KNOWS THAT BEHIND IT ALL THAT JACK IS A DECENT AND LOVING PERSON. AND IT IS OBVIOUS THAT SHE HAS GROWN TO CARE DEEPLY FOR HIM.

 

JENNIFER: You're wrong you know. You don't drag me down. There is a decent guy in there. I've actually seen him a time or two.

 

JACK ROLLS OVER ONTO HIS BACK SNORING WITH THE TULIP IN HIS MOUTH. SHE PULLS IT OUT AND HE STOPS SNORING.

 

JENNIFER: (Smiling at Jack actions and then speaking seriously) Too bad nobody else has.

 

SCENE ONE: IT IS THE NEXT MORNING AND JENNIFER IS ASLEEP ON THE FLOOR. SHE HAS ONE OF JACK'S SHOES LYING ON TOP OF HER. JACK IS STILL ON THE BED HALF COVERED IN THE QUILT WITH THE WILTED TULIP IN HIS MOUTH.

 

JACK: Jennifer, Jennifer. (He starts to sit up and grabs his head.) Oh! Oh!

 

HE SITS UP AND SEES JENNIFER ASLEEP WITH HIS SHOE.

 

JACK: Oh no. (With a terrified expression he looks under the covers to see what he is wearing.) Oh no. Oh (With relief) still intact. Okay....

 

HE TRIES TO GET OUT OF BED BUT SLIPS OFF INSTEAD.

 

JACK: Ssssshhhh!

 

HE MOVES TOWARDS JENNIFER TO RETRIEVE HIS SHOE BUT JENNIFER STIRS AND PUTS HER HAND OVER HIS SHOE AND HE CANNOT GET IT. HE TICKLES HER HAND AND PUTS THE TULIP IN IT AND SLIPS OUT THE SHOE.

 

JACK: Here, come on. Take this pretty flower and give me that nasty old shoe. Okay.

 

HE SPOTS THE OTHER SHOE THE OTHER SIDE OF JENNIFER SO CRAWLS ACROSS THE TOP OF HER TO GET IT.

THEN WITH A SHOE ON EACH HAND HE DRAGS HIMSELF TO THE DOOR.

 

JACK: Oh.

 

HE JUST REACHES THE DOOR WHEN JENNIFER WAKES UP.

 

JENNIFER: Jack, where are you going?

 

SHE WAVES TO HIM FROM HER BED ON THE FLOOR, AND HE WAVES BACK WITH HIS SHOE.

THEN SHE CRAWLS OVER TO HIM AND PUTS HER HAND ON HIS SHOULDER.

 

JENNIFER: Well what are you doing Jack?

JACK: Ssssshhhhh! Don't yell.

JENNIFER: I'm not yelling.

JACK: Ssssshhhhh! Just go ssssshhhhh.

JENNIFER: Jack are okay?

JACK: Yes, I just need to find someplace where I can cut off my head.

JENNIFER: You're hung over, you know.

JACK: Boy you're perky and quick. Unfortunately, I'm not in a condition to deal with either so ssshhh. Goodbye.

 

HE SHUTS THE DOOR, TURNS AROUND AND SLIDES DOWN TO THE FLOOR STILL LEANING ON THE DOOR. JENNIFER OPENS IT AND HE FALLS BACKWARDS INTO THE ROOM.

 

JENNIFER: Jack.

JACK: Oh.

JENNIFER: You're not going anywhere in that condition. Let's go.

JACK: No.

 

SHE GRABS HIS HAND AND TRIES TO PULL HIM. RATHER AMUSED BY JACK PREDICAMENT. BUT ALSO ENJOY THE CLOSENESS THAT THEY ARE SHARING.

 

JENNIFER: Get up.

JACK: No, I....

JENNIFER: I'm going to get you some aspirin.

JACK: No.

JENNIFER: Coffee?

JACK: No.

JENNIFER: Bosco.

JACK: Wha....huh?

JENNIFER: Oh, it's an old family remedy.

JACK: I think....let me take it from here.

JENNIFER: Well you stay right here. I'm going to get you a cold cloth. Don't move.

 

JENNIFER GOES TO THE BATHROOM BUT JACK POURS OUT A GLASS OF WATER AND TOSSES IT IN HIS FACE. THEN HE PICKS UP THE WATER JUG AND POURS IT ALL OVER HIMSELF.

 

JACK: Aaaaah! Feels good.

 

TALKING FROM THE BATHROOM.

 

JENNIFER: Boy Jack, boy you really tied one on last night.

 

SHE RETURNS. HE GLARES AT HER AND SO SHE BEGINS TO GENTLY PAT HIS FACE WITH A TOWEL.

 

JENNIFER: But I guess you already....you already know that.

JACK: (Worried that he let his guard down.) Yah. And listen Jennifer, about last night, I didn't do anything like....er....you know like dance on the tables or wearing any lampshades or that.

JENNIFER: What, you don't remember?

JACK: Remember what?

JENNIFER: (Enjoying Jack's misery, she teases him.) Jack, you got married last night. You married this beautiful show girl and she has four children and she looks beautiful for her age.

 

JACK NEARLY FALLS FROM THE SHOCK.

 

JACK: Yeah?

JENNIFER: Yeah, Lola and she's going to be here any minute.

JACK: Lola.

JENNIFER: Yeah.

JACK: Lola, "Stretch marks," Lola.

JENNIFER: No Jack. I'm just kidding.

JACK: Oh I knew that. Aye, aye, aye. (He falls forward onto the bed.)

JENNIFER: Actually, you know, last night, you were kinda sweet.

 

HE BOUNCES UPRIGHT. WITH A TERRIFIED EXPRESSION.

 

JACK: Sweet? Sweet? As in, "Have some candy little girl?"

JENNIFER: No. As in...."sweet."

JACK: I liked it better when I was married.

JENNIFER: Come on Jack. It's no big deal. You got a little drunk, you loosened up and you said some nice things.

JACK: (Feeling awkward) Look, I better get going.

JENNIFER: No wait Jack. Jack wait. Jack.

 

HE PUTS ON HIS SUNSHADE BACKWARDS AND STUMBLES TO THE DOOR. HE SLIPS BACK INTO JACK MODE.

 

JACK: Look, you get packed and I'll go see if there's a plane out there somewhere.

JENNIFER: Wait a minute. There's nothing wrong with having some fun....or being nice. Come on. I had a really great time last night. I think you did too.

JACK: That was last night.

JENNIFER: Oh come on. Let's just stay a little longer. We'll go play some Blackjack. It'll be fun.

JACK: Look, I have a newspaper to run and you have to get back. I'll pick you up in (Emphasizing each word) one half an hour.

JENNIFER: Oh come on Jack. Let's just....

JACK: One half an hour!

JENNIFER: (Saluting sarcastically) Yes sir.

JACK: Yes. Scoot.

 

HE SHUTS THE DOOR AND TURNS AROUND TO WIPE HIS FOREHEAD BUT SEES HE HAS HER TOWEL IN HIS HAND. HE KNOCKS ON THE DOOR AND SHE OPENS IT.

 

JACK: (Sheepishly) I think this belongs to the hotel.

 

SHE SNATCHES THE TOWEL FROM HIM AND SLAMS THE DOOR.

 

JACK: Thank you.

 

JENNIFER GOES INSIDE AND BEGINS TO WHACK THE INSIDE OF THE DOOR WITH THE TOWEL. THIS TIME NOT APPRECIATING HIS ANTICS.

 

JENNIFER: You're a jerk Jack. Jerk. You're the biggest jerk I know.

 

OUTSIDE THE DOOR, JACK CANNOT MOVE BUT STANDS THERE WINCING IN PAIN AT LEAVING HER.

 

JACK: (Little boy voice) My shirt....my shirt's caught in the door. Jennifer?

SCENE TWO: THEY ARE BACK HOME IN SALEM. EMILIO TAKES JENNIFER TO LOOK FOR JULIO AT THE CHEATIN' HEART BUT THEY GET INTO A CONVERSATION ABOUT JACK AND HER RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. SHE REFUSES TO TALK ABOUT JACK WITH EMILIO.

SCENE THREE: MEANWHILE JACK HAS SEEN THEM GO IN AND WATCHES FROM OUTSIDE AS THEY HAVE THEIR DATE. HE IS IN REAL PAIN SEEING THEM TOGETHER.

SCENE FOUR: THEY COME OUT AND HE HIDES BEHIND SOME METAL DRUMS. AFTER THEY WALK PAST HE GOES TO LEAVE BUT BUMPS HIS HEAD ON THE EDGE OF A BARREL. HE RUBS IT AND LOOKS SAD THAT HE IS ALONE WITHOUT HER.